From the lamb's mouth...
Life in abundance??
woohoo... these days have been really great!! as in walking closely with my Lord.. such a blessed time for me! and i haven't left Jesus cooped up in my home or in church... been exercising a Spirit filled life more and more.. anyway, thanks God for all the wonderful resources that He's provided for me.. am learning lots! But of course i'm still far from perfect.. day b4 i was going through some depressive feelings.. hmm.. is not common for me these days/weeks.. but hopefully i handled it ok..
yesterday God help me through the first day of my second guitar workshop thingies.. and yar.. was quite ok.. except i ended up giving too much info.. anyway, i've a passion for guitar so have decided to (in my free time) to put up lots of guitar resources which i find useful online and allow for others to check it out.. first will be on theory.. coz that's where many church guitarists are lacking.. i also wanna keep a 'lesson journal' thing.. to put done in writing the things i'm continually learning.. a bit like this blog but more purposeful.. have to get work on that soon else it won't happen.. k.. song writing is happening but really slowly.. but i think that shouldn't stop me from continuing.. i though about it and i don't want some simple formula to write songs.. i want to put in the effort to come up with something that God enjoys.. and i believe He delights in the process more anyway.. k.. that's it from me..
Not a Reader... sigh
just realised i have probably more than 15 books i want to read.. but yar.. i take so long on just one.. some from last year even. anyway, i'm reading Lee Strobel's "Case for Faith" and it's really gd i find.. i'm just mid way into the 2nd chapter but am enjoying it lots.. and yar.. i'm using my new qt material.. beth moore's "Living Beyond Yourself".. so far is quite gd.. am learning and all.. is aimed towards the females but yar.. since i already have started using it i'll finish it.. i dun mind that too much anyway.. can experience a different perspective at some usual things.. i'm cutting down on games already coz yar.. not much eternal value.. but of course is gd for entertaining me sometimes.. if that's ok.. last few days before holidays over.. hopefully can be productive in the way i spend my time.. k, that's it.. i know this is very random..
Hillsong Reflections and more
Okay, it's been quite a while since i've last posted and have decided to do it since it is my commitment to God.. am just going to write what i'm thinking now..
Just a few reflections on my hillsong trip. i think my most enjoyed part of the whole trip was the fellowship i had with my TPMC friends. I think God was renewing in me the desire and passion to return back to serve in my local church (Singapore). Anyway, the conference started dull for me.. i guess since it was the 4th conference i had been to, i was kinda immune to much of the experiences. If you don't know what the hillsong conference is, i'll give a brief description/advertisement now.
- Run by the Hillsong Chuch in Sydney
- A christian event
- Once a year
- Open to anyone to register for
- a gathering of about 30k++ ppl at the olympic park, sydney
- runs for 5nights 4days
- Typical schedule: (9am - morning rally, 10.45am - Stream sessions, 12.30pm till 3pm - Electives, 4.30pm - night rally 1, 7.45pm - night rally 2)
- A must go for anyone who can afford to and has a desire to know and love God more.
ok, on to some of my thoughts.. well.. started dull.. and though i tried to take every message and teaching positively and responsibly, i found it was more 'head' feeding than 'heart' feeding.. thus i was a lil disappointed i think.. another thing to note is that i went in with little expectation and preparation.. i hadn't really came with a hungry spirit nor did i come with many qns for God. i just came. i did think about the event and psyched myself up a bit b4 though. anyway, as the days went by, i wondered if i was meant to be at the conference.. maybe it was just an impulse decision from the prev year.. could have saved the money for other stuff.. and so on. However i trusted God to do something with me.. that there was something more for me. and of course i raised this issue with Him each day.. =P Well.. thursday (2nd to last day) was the first message which spoke into my heart.. it was by Louie Giglo.. it was not a new sorta message but it was something so fundamental for us in the worship ministry and though i can't remember the points offhand, i know that it was something i really wanted to be covered in the conference. Not for my sake but for us all.. now that i think about it, i guess i was a bit disappointed with the conference in the beginning becoz they failed to reach the standard i set for it based on past experiences.. as in regards to more the topics and speakers.. but yar, finally God gave me what i needed.. a renewed hope in the conference. From then on things got better and better but i won't expound on that too much now coz i'm tired... and the best part! after the conference, on the friday nithgt, my and a few of our group (7 of us) shared our thoughts and experiences with each other.. that was totally my favourite part! the strange thing is i can't really recall what i shared.. at the time i was like "Holy Spirit, i've got nothing to say and my turn is coming up next, help me!" and yar.. He DID! went smooth and everything... and the points were from my heart.. i just can't remember it now.. but yar.. will spend some time later on to go through my notes and etc. must not let things fade away. God is maturing me.. is totally exciting to see but scary to be.. oh well.. what must be done, must be done.
Leadership:
just something to note, i think God is calling me to leadership (for later).. it's not something i like to do or am gd at but i'm willing to try.. bought 2 books to read so i won't be totally unprepared.. but yar.. when i go back to TPMC, i hope i'll be ready to do the work He was planned for me.. no matter how big, or how small!
Exams:
Wow.. Exam results came out yesterday.. and yar.. am totally in awe of the things God does for me.. got excellent results again (to me that is). totally undeserved.. i think back to last year when i got those totally unexpected results and i'm just so amazed coz prep and after exam feelings were no different t0 those i had when i was getting Credits and Passes.. all i wanted was to do ok.. but now God has been showing me that i can do well.. and i will trust Him to help me. I'm not sure i wrote this already but i believe the shocking results are God's answer to my fears of not getting first class honours 2 years ago.. i know results are not everything but it's also not wrong to want to do well.. and i know God's plans are to prosper me (in the best possible way) so yar.. just do my best and see what happens lar. i actually enjoy studying and uni now.. God is just totally amazing!!
Future:
Remember the issue i was having about relationship.. as in not having them? well.. i think i'm getting more and more convinced and approving of the not finding a wife idea.. really think i can be a much more effective servant of God if i'm not attached.. plus i'm still really not ready in terms of maturity for a relationship still.. i find myself too naive anyway.. so yar.. i dun think it's easy, but will just do so. and whilst doing so, i'll have to deal with my depressive type thoughts as well.. long way to go.. Some thing that came to mind a while ago, this doesn't necessarily mean i'll never have a wife, family etc.. i was reminded that though Abraham was called to sacrifice his son, God's intention was never to take his life. but to test Abrahams faith. so yar.. God, it's up to u.
'Benediction':
With a renewed commitment and trust in the Lord i will continue to live the life i'm called (only by Your grace). Father thanks for all that's been happening in my life. i know that u'll only use it to make me more and more into your image. teach me daily the things i need to learn and help me through every trial and task u have for me. remind me that i'm in Your hands and so is the world. i am marked with the blood of Your Son.. My hope is in Your Name, Your Word, Your love. In Your precious Son's Name i pray all these. Amen. Gdnite Lord.